Oof, there is definitely a baby in there now.
In the past, I've read a lot of articles that wax poetic about how great pregnancy is, how fantastic you'll feel and all that blah-blah. I don't know how anyone managed to get so high off the pregnancy hormones because for me, at least, it's been pretty boring. The only difference is that I have a tiny human growing inside of me, I get winded going upstairs and I can't jump in Zumba. I haven't had any wild mood swings and I'm quite capable of doing 95% of what I can do when I'm not pregnant. I'm grateful, so grateful, for that fact because it means that we're a healthy pair, me and Peanut.
Lately, I've been daydreaming about what she'll be like when she gets here. Things that I wonder about now:
- Will she have hair when she's born? Will it be brown?
- Will her little eyes be brownish-blue like mine were?
- Will she look more like her daddy at first?
- How big will she be? (My obstetrician guesses 7lbs 6oz.)
- Am I going to go stir crazy on maternity leave or will I love it?
It's starting to feel surreal that if Peanut is cooperative, we'll be bringing her home in ~12 weeks. My thoughts generally go like this:
We are going to have a baby. Holy sh!t! A TINY HUMAN that is completely dependent on us to care for her and teach her. That's slightly terrifying. No, that's really terrifying. But aww! Peanut! She's going to be so cute and ours. I'll get to dress her up, tote her around and snuggle her!However, nowhere in the thought process do I become terrified, or even really frightened, of the birth aspect. I guess I just don't see a reason to infuse a natural process with fear of pain. I mean, yes obviously, it's going to hurt some but it's not like there isn't an end to it. And, honestly, I'd like everyone to keep their horror stories to themselves because just like everyone's pregnancy, the birth is going to be completely different.
First Trimester Recap